Raising My Tiny Disciples

I really do want to do it all but:

I look at my sweet little guy eating his bites of dinner and nothing else matters. The table full of left over taco mess and the floor. Yeah I’ll get to it.. eventually

I am laying down with Piper frustrated because she won’t go to sleep after an hour of trying. Then she finally snuggles in and figures out its bedtime. Just watching her fall asleep makes my heart melt.

I do want to do a lot of things. Or dream of big things. But really in the moment. I’m just working on enjoying the everyday life. Me trying to figure out how to blow up the kids little pool because its finally almost 90 in Illinois. (That was hilarious btw well now it’s funny when I was living it I was quite frustrated actually.

I’ve come to the conclusion that the important things really are being here for my family so its time to take care of myself. I need to stop eating so much junk. There are people who wish they could lose 10lbs to fit in a swimsuit for summer. Not me. I’m the biggest I’ve every been my whole life besides when I was pregnant. I don’t like feeling like this. Who would? Will I make it to the gym 5 days a week? Unlikely -I don’t really want my kids there that much. But I can go 3 times at least. I can get my 10,000 steps in everyday. I was doing 8000 so what’s an extra 2000? Jace and I went for a nice walk around the barn and I finished it up today. That was refreshing. I was proud of myself. Now I just need to keep it up and do it again and again.

But let’s circle back to this cooking thing. A lot of days my kids eat frozen protein pancakes for breakfast and most days peanut butter and jelly for lunch. Dinner… is hit or miss. I’ve been trying to include at least one thing I know they will eat. But again who knows? Sometimes I figure they’re absolutely going to eat their mac & cheese and then they just leave it on their plates 🤦‍♀️ So I try a different recipe. Or try to let then help me cook so they will want to eat. But some nights I still find myself wondering.. why do I cook?

I really do want to do it all.

I want to take care of my kids.

I want to play with them I want to teach them.

I want to 100% declutter and clean the house. Like the windows. I don’t think there has EVER been a day where I said yup today I have nothing to do so I’ll just clean the windows. Which reminds me today I noticed Piper’s yogurt hand prints on the front window. I was feeding Cirrus and rocking. Totally forgot until just now. It’s 10:18 and we just got the kids to sleep. Jace is still rocking with Cirrus and I just spent the last 7 min looking for my pink table for the bed so I could just sit in bed and write. Oh hello Me time! So I won’t be getting up to clean the windows at the moment and will most likely forget again until tomorrow when I sit in the rocker and put Cirrus down for his nap.

ANYWAY— I want to do it all! I want write a blog post and read 3 chapters of my bible (So I can read the Bible in a year)-and actually read the Bible in its entirety. I want to do another Beth Moore study or Bible study fellowship. I want to make sure I read the portals of prayer overnight before I go to bed . And I want to actually get 8 hours of sleep!

I want to take care of my health and cook healthier foods and get to the gym 5 days a week. And sit in the sauna. I want to Homeschool my kids and have another baby. (Maybe twins ahahahahasdkjfhaidfxvnaekrduzghvqekdrgnfv)

I want to sit on the coach and watch grays anatomy and relax

I want to have a garden (I just planted it yesterday) I want to weed it and watch it grow and pick the tomatoes and peppers with Cessna. And eat our big Husky Cherry tomatoes right off the vine? (Is it technically called the vine?)

I want to take care of my chickens (I have 6)

And then there’s the big stuff. The hopes and dreams of one day..

I want to be a National Sales Director with Mary Kay! Holding parties and recruiting appointments and mentoring. Teaching skin care and make up artistry. I want to spend time learning so I can be a better teacher!

I want to write books! A devotion, a novel, a self help and autobiography. I want to blog and write screenplays.

I want to learn the Piano and guitar! I want to make music and sing with my new guitar skills.

I want to get back in the sky! “There are emergency exits located in the front midcabin and back of the aircraft” Shoot man I want to learn to fly the airplane!

I want to get horses and ride.

I want to see the world with my family and get away with just my husband. I want to see my friends!

*****

Guess what! It’s 10:36 and I did something. I wrote a blog post:) My kitchen and dinning room are clean. The kids are alive, and I’m about to work on my German lesson (thanks Duolingo) —didn’t even have that on the list. Learn German and Spanish and Japanese. Anyway yes. My German lesson read my 3 chapters. And hopefully portals of prayer and maybe make it to bed by 1130!?

Yeah its a lot.. but you know what.. God doesn’t put a dream in your heart without first giving you all the tools you need to accomplish it. So one dream at a time,

And remember to enjoy the journey and remember everything takes time.

What are your hopes and dreams?

(PS Almost done editing and Jace put Cirrus down in his bed… and he’s crying 🤦‍♀️)

This might just be my happy place…. One of them. I’m in the parking lot at work. For the first time in a really REALLY long time. It’s strange being away from the kids for a hot minute. I drove two hours to the airport this morning to get my new parking pass and my updated badge. I got married almost six years ago and I’ve finally changed my name at work. It’s a long boring story.

So here I am in my new work parking lot. Listening to airplanes flying overhead. It seriously makes me so happy. I miss airplanes.

Yes I need to get back to my kids. Sometimes you just have to fill your bucket. I’ve been running on empty. My husband has been in training and has been gone for five to six days at a time. This is his last week of training. He works eight flights in four days. He’ll be home Friday and then we get on with life as we know it.

OH MY GOODNESS, A BOEING 777 JUST FLEW OVER MY HEAD AND I FELT IT IN MY CHEST AIRPLANES ARE SO MY HAPPY PLACE!!! 

This morning was a blessing because I was able to wake up after feeding my son. I stayed up and had a devotion time before I headed out to the airport. It was a wonderful much needed time! I think filling up my soul with God and a little airplane action was just what I needed. Now I’m ready to get back to the kids. Batteries recharged!

Note: I’ve been trying to write a post since the end of January. I’ll post it soon! But for now here we are. I hope you can get some rest and relaxation today too.

Love, Drea

Ok first off if you’re here for the mortal combat reference I apologize this has nothing to do with that. It’s just my second post and that’s what my brain was reminded of.

*Cracks knuckles

If I was going to give this one a different name it would be…. “Sunset in the chaos”

Life with 3 children… 4 years ,2 years and 6 months. It’s beautiful but it is totally nuts! On this particular evening. I took my 6 month old son to the changing table and outside the window I noticed the colors in the sky above the houses. I decided to walk outside and really look at the sunset. In the mist of trying to do showers, brush teeth and bedtime (this can be very much like herding cats) a very brief much needed moment of calm. My husband was inside helping with the dishes. I said honey come here for a minute. So together we stood in our driveway looking at the beautiful sky. I was grateful for that moment to just take a breath. SO if you need a reminder. Here it is!! It doesn’t have to be enjoying a sunset over housetops. Maybe just standing in your living room in the middle of the overwhelm. Remember to stop, take a deep breath and enjoy the moment. This is just a season in life and it is going to go by so fast.

❤ Drea